Gracefull Pain
by Whisteria
Summary: An entry in the diary of grace polk. the secrets left untold. (Chapters added Ocassionaly)
1. the first entry

Author Notes: This is a diary entry to Grace Polks new secret journal. If reviews are good I may add chapters/entries to this... otherwise it will remain what it started out as, an expirament.  
  
Dedication: To Admiral Lily whos storys inspire me beyond words. When she added me to her favorite authors, I cried... It was an amazing honor, and tho I dont personaly know you, I dedicate this to you.  
  
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-Gracefull Pain-  
  
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+ So I decided to keep a journal. Big deal, I could have done worse. Alot has gone on latley that I'd rather not share with anyone, so, yeah that's where this blank white paper comes in.   
  
+ Girardi and Rove are constantly moping around. The trio isn't itself. Why do they do it to themselves? It's not like their fooling anyone... we all know they'd rather spend chemistry together in the locker room.  
  
+ Geek boy... I mean Luke, he's dating Glyniss now. They make an interesting couple. Would make for a great movie; "Nerds In Love"  
  
+ Alll I do latley is complain. Not that I don't want to be happy, but you can't choose your feelings, right? Don't get me wrong, life was great... until they turned me upside down and forced me to breath. Damn them unskilled nurses. Since then it's been a slow death. I suppose I'm lucky to have the friends I do, but at the same time blind for letting go what I had. He liked me you know... Luke Girardi... it's always been kind of aparent. No guy ever liked me that way. I had alot of fun with Luke, even kissed him once, but only to prove a point... he was my crash test dummy. I guess in a way I did what Girardi did, let the guy go. But I had better reasoning, I'm sure. After Ethan, I'm not sure I can trust a guy. I dont mean the whole 'break my heart' high school 'he cheated on me' crap either. I dont care about that. When Ethan... took advantage, to put it simply... my world changed. I haven't even told Rove.   
  
+ Maybe I like Luke because he seems safe. I can't explain.  
  
+ Life is hard but worth living. Everyday in Arcadia has a story to be told, and a person to piss off.  
  
+ Grace +  
  
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Reviews greatly appriciated. This was my first diary style FF atempt. 


	2. the second entry

Author Notes: this ones pretty self explainitory - its the second entry/chapter to the diary of Grace Polk. In this one you learn a bit more about why she can seem so bitter at times and what she realy wishes she were like.  
  
Dedication: to all the people who added me to their favorite authors or put me on author alert... you guys make me feel so special, you rock!  
  
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Wow. longest journal I have ever kept. Two consecutive entries, imagine that. Joan called me today. She wanted advice. Now why would anyone come to me for advice? I don't do advice. But I made an exeption in this case. I told her to go to him, but I doubt she will. Infact, I know she wont. If I hadn't been sworn to secrecy by the "we're best friends you have to keep in between us" commity, I would tell them both how retarded this is. Rove thinks she's some kind of goddess. It's disturbing if you think about it. Anyhow, I wont admit this out loud... ever ... but I'm learning from them. I think I need to talk to Luke. I don't want to break him and froggie apart, lord knows she would die without her little insect, but I can't go on not knowing anymore. Luke's the only one I've ever wanted to tell teh truth to, yet I don't want his sympathy. I hate sympathy. Pity comes out of sympathy and leads to the endless cycle of anoying sorrows. Maybe I would be different... had more been done.... maybe I wouldn't be so negative. What gets to me is they didn't even prosecute the jerk. Ethan, I mean. He got to walk... with a frikin warning. I wasn't even the first girl he had done it to either... I was fourteen and just trying to fit in... yeah back then it seemed to matter. My hair was long then, with all those girlie sparkle clips and glitter, and I rarley wore anything with long sleeves. I thought it would be cool to date an eighteen year old... like I said, I wanted to fit in. I was young, I was stupid, I was valnurable... I'd like to see him try it again though... wouldn't that be interesting?  
  
Ever notice how all of my entries are just mindless rants? I think I'll go call geek boy now... It has to be done eventually anyhow, and I'm dying to know about Girardi and Rove (Once again, I will NEVER admit that). I'll update later... maybe...  
  
SIDE NOTE; I SWEAR TO GOD GIRARDI IF YOU EVEN STEP CLOSE TO THIS I SHALL BEAR YOU WITH A KOALA BEAR... IN A HAT!  
  
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to POSSIBLY be continued 


	3. the third entry

Author Notes: I used a couple of direct 'Grace quotes' in this entry so of course I have to give credit where credit is due - Credit for some quotes from the show go to the writer of that specific episode, David Grae. Other than that I wrote it and put it together to make Graces diary entry number 3. Yay.   
  
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Gracefull Pain - Chapter 3  
  
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So the other day Rove found a girl. Suprised? So was I... but belive me he's not that into her... She's all over him, it sickens me. I even gave her a name... "Couzin It" - Theres just a few us that talk to eachother... I dont want to have to talk to anyone else - I told Girardi to kill it off before it gets too bad. I think the girl is already leached herself onto him. It hurts Girardi, It's so obvious. Why Rove would do such a thing I have no clue...  
  
Girardi is still up to her weird behavior. What ever inspired her to watch little kids? And then miss a concert of some god forsaken band she wanted to see just so she could do volunteer work? Shes such a charity case her self its sad.   
  
I think Friedmans getting a little weirded than usual. It wouldn't suprise me if the boy claimed to be probed by aliens.. or if he realy were... Please, if you probe him again... take him with you! He's always looking at my stomach... ugh...   
  
And on a more serious note; how will understanding boiling points improve our lives? Will it help us boil things faster? Will it make us appreciate the virtues of boiled food? Or is it just a useless academic exercise in the pursuit of a useless high school degree? I'm not stupid, but lets be real... am I actualy going to have to understand boiling points when im picking up my groceries... "Ah yes, Cherios, those would boil great..." I think not...  
  
And honestly why do they always call things a "pair"? I mean they have a "pair" of underwear and a "pair" of boxers - but is there realy two of them? NO! Why can't we say a "pair" of bras? Because that would mean there was two bras! Ugh... Some people need to be straightened out.  
  
and at school, on career day, did you ever notice they have everything covered exept the booth for those who just want to live in thier car? It's an evil conspiracy - wait and see...  
  
More later... If your lucky.  
  
-Grace  
  
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Ok that didn't come out as planned, but as you know each chappy to this story is incredibly short... thats why its called her diary and not an actual story... heh. reviews greatly appriciated. -Crystal 


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